So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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