OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Randomize
