well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
