we're blogging at a bar
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Randomize
