is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Randomize
