remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize