so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize