I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Randomize
