you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
