a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Randomize
