The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Randomize
