i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
