Dual....:-)
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize