laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
