redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
