I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize
