In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
