Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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