Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize