I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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