Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
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