I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
