i permit you to call me
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
