left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
