Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
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