you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
