FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I can't put those talents on a resume
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
