i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
