Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
how drunk are you?
Several
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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