Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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