i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
