We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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