Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
