I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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