shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
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