Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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