I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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