he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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