you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
