I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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