Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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