Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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