I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
