yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
