Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
