actually, I'm a sock model
I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
