i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
