Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
what the fuck happened to the tacos
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
