batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
You smell like a Billy Joel song
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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