i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
