Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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