I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Randomize
